Parents have the experience of the past, but not the future.
It is very important to deeply consider all information, especially (but never limited to) a parent’s information. With that fairly stated, it is even more important to have a measurement system to understand how to process and synthesize information for optimal execution.
The oscillation between taking in well-intended information and executing it without proper thought must always be observed and analyzed individually for optimum self-health. Overall, direct action on external information without internal synthesis will often result in less-than-desirable and/or sub-optimal outcomes. Therefore analysis is required to fully utilize external information.
From the authority’s point of view, this reality of the need for internal synthesis can assuage any contention between parent and child when a child questions a parent’s directive. The classic declaration of “because I’m the parent, that’s why” in response to a child’s innocent questioning is a traditional and ubiquitous lack of articulation from the parents’ standpoint. Just because one is an authority (in any regard, including, but not limited to, parenting) doesn’t mean that it’s not a conversation or that you don’t have to respect the child by articulating what you need. Articulation is directly proportional to the amount of obeying a child will do. Being challenged to articulate is not to be taken personally. It’s an opportunity not only for improved conversation but for building trust and demonstrating to the child how to articulate their own inner thoughts and needs. Children are not challenging the individual when they ask questions. They’re challenging notions they don’t understand. If the parent understands that, they can approach communication differently. That point of view is incumbent on the parent as the more mature and experienced conversational participant.
As for the individual receiving information — whether a child listening to a parent or an adult listening to a mentor or authority figure — it is important to listen deeply to others’ experiences. Those experiences can be utilized in context as lessons to adopt or avoid based on the future, not their past. No one individual is an authority on the future, even if they set the standard.
Whether a parent, guardian, mentor, and/or role model — everything is teamwork, communication, and learning. That is a two-way street to attain (but most importantly maintain) a clear individual perspective outside necessary and helpful authority.
What is the most useful lesson your parent or guardian taught you that you apply to this day?
